And the sad thing is that they're both right. There is no real one to blame. I think calling it 'supremely selfish' is a bit too far because he felt he was PROTECTING them by keeping them in the dark. The 'supremely selfish' thing to do would have been letting Moriarty shoot them dead and not give a crap as long as Sherlock himself was okay. I'd call it more stupid and short-sighted but not selfish because it wasn't something he was doing for his own benefit at all. And for all we know, he probably was right, if he'd told them the truth then maybe it would've failed and they'd have died. Sherlock doesn't believe that 'friends protect him' but at the same time that is exactly what he did for John, Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade.

But I also don't think it's a matter of John 'getting over it', it's never that simple. I just don't think the key to fixing their relationship is a one-sided thing on Sherlock's part though. They both have to work through issues, understanding and forgiveness or else there would be no hope. Sherlock needs to understand that he needs to start trusting people and not going off on his own and John would appreciate that Sherlock is TRYING to be a good man, a hero, and even though this stunt hurt John - he's still breathing and that's down to Sherlock. There would be nothing special about John being in Sherlock's life in the first place if he wasn't the one person who believed in him and accepted him, flaws and all.

Argh, sorry for rambling, this all still gives me too many Feelings. XD